The Legend of the CHEESEVIVÖR - INCORRUPTIBLE BATTALION BATTLES 5&6 (Updated 06.12.20)

This is a brillIant serving of cheese! The quality has seriously been upgraded from the last round.

Elvinking is a worthy trooper, with a decent video and production, but Brothers of Metal is just pure genius. A terrible band name for a female-fronted group, loincloths and eye makeup, terrible and awkward growly guy mucking everything up,by-the-numbers music that is both unexciting and somehow still catchy, and Bloody Mouth McWhispers is golden! Also, the lead singer is actually quite good. I want to hear more from this band (hopefully without the co-singer dude).

Kryptos was so boring. They’ve clearly never heard of a lead guitar. Why is the intro one minute of boring pedal riffing? Why do they write lyrics in English if they don’t understand the language? Cheesy, sure, but mostly bland and bad. But Serious Black...whoa buddy, we have another contender for the crown! Cheesy as fuck high budget video with a lead singer who sounds like Weird Al, a band full of Nightwish rejects, the goofiness of Ghost ramped up to a thousand, and named after a Harry Potter character? Not to mention: it’s also a catchy tune!

I’d be happy if these two bands made the finals.
 
LooseCannon said:
I am terribly sorry.
Click to expand...

giphy.gif
 
The Elvenking song is pretty decent. I liked that album from last year and there were better moments on it.

The video for the Brothers of Metal song is really bad and yeah, the male vocalist is annoying and unnecessary. If you gave some teenagers professional filming equipment to make their first Metal video it would look something like this. The main singer is actually really good and probably wasted on a silly band like Brothers of Metal. However, as ridiculous as this song is, their new album 'Emblas Saga' is actually really fucking good. It's still cheesey and silly, but the songs are much better and the male vocalist is less annoying. @MrKnickerbocker I suggest you listen to 'Powersnake' from 'Emblas Saga'. Very fun and memorable, although you might start thinking "tell me why I had to be a Powersnake".

I'm actually a bit frustrated that these two were paired together as I have at least a soft spot for each, but I'm voting for Brothers of Metal.


I quite like the Kryptos riff but it gets somewhat hypnotic and repetitive throughout the song. The vocals are annoying too and I can't tell the verses apart from the chorus. There was potential here but it ended up being pretty dull.

I've heard Serious Black a few times before as they sometimes appear on my Spotify playlists. The name alone suggests cheese, the vocals and the dumb laugh in the first verse serve it on a silver platter. The chorus is far more prominent and memorable compared to Kryptos, basically what one would expect from a cheese song. It gets my vote.
 
Elvenking weren't too cheesy and neither were Brothers of Metal (apart from the stupid band name). Going with the latter. Didn't even realize those were female vocals.

I really really like Urban Breed (Serious Black's singer) but he's unrecognizable in this shit band. Going with Kryptos.
 
Elvenking - the song isn't cheese enough. It's a little boring (not as much as that Ironsword song though), the cheese exists but it's too scarce, the funny person with a red-painted face making hand movements and the singer's enthusiasm are the biggest providers for me.

Brothers of Metal - the mixed vocals really don't work outside of the chorus, but yo this chorus is pretty great. But while I liked this song much more, I don't know if it's cheesier. Elvenking at least had a violin, these guys have mostly just a good chorus. Ehhhhhh maybe Norse mythology and stuff carries it an extra mile. Let's go with Brothers of Metal.


Kryptos - is this a song or the new World of Warcraft character's voice lines?

Serious Black - to start with, these guys use their 4 minutes for more than just reading flashcards. Fun song, packs good cheese in the chorus and bridge. The cool (but disturbing) video definitely helps, but not like any of this is needed. Anything beats Kryptos' turd.
 
I'm actually a bit surprised to find Kryptos here - they're from Bengaluru, the same city as I am, and I thought they were an unknown local band.
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Back
Top