make up a lie about the previous poster

I am not finding it very difficult to think up a funny lie about Diesel, as i have never done so before in this thread
 
MW564 is a saber-toothed tiger named Benjamin Breeg. His cloning in a time beyond the new frontier set up a reincarnation like none other, in which he came back as a weretiger who fell in love with Charlotte, but was rejected on the grounds of, and I quote, "his teeth being too fucking big". This made him become extinct all over again. RIP.
 
It is of great annoyance to Cried that Cried is not referred to by Cried's full title, as the abbreviation could lead to confusion between Cried and Cried's archnemesis CriedWhenBlazeyLeft.
 
Wiz's custom title refers to his longstanding role at Kellogg's where he has succesfully defended the company against claims that Coco Pops don't pop & that the monkey is made up.
 
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