Metallica

I have it on good authority that “most people” would rather gargle the sweat wrung from Lars’s post-concert jock strap than listen to St. Anger one more time. I also polled my dog and a drunk guy at the bar and they assured me that “most people” think that “Escape” is the best song on Ride The Lightning, so I guess it must be true.
 
Jer said:
I have it on good authority that “most people” would rather gargle the sweat wrung from Lars’s post-concert jock strap than listen to St. Anger one more time. I also polled my dog and a drunk guy at the bar and they assured me that “most people” think that “Escape” is the best song on Ride The Lightning, so I guess it must be true.
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You don't have to believe me or anyone else here, but I can assure that your beliefs aren't any closer to the reality than mine or Diesel's. Also talking with many many fans on the internet forums and reading a shit load of reviews isn't exactly the worst evidence for my statements.
 
Black Album doesn't count as classic Metallica for me. Metallica is a thrash metal band and Black Album isn't thrash.

I do like it for what it is, though.
 
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The Flash said:
Black Album doesn't count as classic Metallica for me. Metallica is a thrash metal band and Black Album isn't thrash.

I do like it for what it is, though.
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This except I don’t like it for what it is. If the music spoke to me on any level I would probably rate it higher.
 
List time
1. And Justice For All
2. Death Magnetic
3. Master of Puppets
4. Ride the Lightning
5. The Black Album
6. Kill Em All
7. Hardwired to Self Destruct
8. Load
9. Reload
10. St. Anger




11. Lulu
 
Now, I'm no thrash purist myself (which might be evident from the fact how high I put Reload), but I'm genuinely baffled by the Black Album love. It's not bad, far from that, but... you really don't find it somewhat uneven? There are some good, possibly even great tracks (Sandman, Sad but True, Wherever I May Roam) that I really like, but... but...

The "thrashy" tracks are rather pedestrian and boring (Holier, Through the Never, Struggle Within), the God that Failed has an intriquing lyrical concept, but the riff is kinda... childish? And it really doesn't work for all five of its minutes. My Friend of Misery is the kind of slow, dark, grungey stuff they would learn to do better over the next two records (though the instrumental part is nice) and Don't Tread on Me... is not bad, but not stellar either. So they're quoting Bernstein, big deal.
And then there's Of Wolf and Man, which is 50% macho bullshit and 50% of a boring, constipated track. "Sheep shit", indeed.

And Nothing Else Matters is sappy and cheesy and overplayed as hell. Okay, maybe it's because here in Czechia it became this kind of "hymn of a generation", people were engraving the lyrics into school desks, it was being played at every campfire... okay, it was right after the revolution, but it's still way too much love for such a track. In any way, I'd still say it's really not something I'd want to hear from Tullica. I liked Mama Said, which is much subtler and personal, but this one... no, not really.
 
Puppets
RTL
AJFA
KEA
TBA
LOAD
HTSD
DM
Reload

Haven't heard St. Anger or Lulu and don't have any intention of hearing them. Didn't include Garage Inc. but the original disc of classic era bsides would be 5th on the list
 
Oh we're doing rankings? Sure.

1. Puppetz
2. Lightning
3. Justice
4. Black Album
5. Load
6. Kill 'Em All
7. HTSD
8. DM
9. Reload
10. St. Anger

Some of my thoughts: the top two (sometimes even the top three) tend to vary. I can't honestly say Puppets is massively better than Lightning and in fact it's worse in some ways (production - MoP sounds more like typical 80s bleh with the awful snare sound and the crunchy Mesa/Boogie Mark 2C+ sound isn't quite there yet; I just prefer Lightning's slightly chorused and heavily reverby Marshall sound) but it also doesn't have Escape on it, sooo...

AJFA is just a hair under those two largely because of the dry production. It just kills the impact of some of the songs, even if the songwriting overall is at least up to par for the most part. Just a little bit more bass would've helped enormously. And maybe less dry guitars and drums while we're at it.

TBA and Load are close to interchangeable to me. TBA has better and more memorable riffs and none of the songs I consider outright bad or annoying to listen (Don't Tread on Me being the exception). James is on his A game and the production is absolutely monstrous, which Load doesn't quite match. Load's is more varied, subtle - the guitars have more than one color where TBA's basically is either shimmering clean or dirty as hell. That said, TBA undoubtedly has stronger songs, even if Load's highs surpass TBA at points.

KEA is kind of in a weird place. I dunno where to put it. I like it, but I don't love it. Jump in the Fire and Metal Militia are both pretty terrible songs. But there's more to love here than on HTSD or DM so it gets to be number six. HTSD has eight songs I rank good to great and four middling ones, one of which is completely terrible. DM's songs are more varied and tend to be more average, but also have really, really good bits in them so it's hard to rank them. HTSD's production is much better so I'm going with that for number seven.

Reload is mostly trash, but includes a couple of absolute gems which unfortunately aren't enough to save it. St. Anger is practically all trash, with a few good bits here and there. They're both albums I actively dislike, so they're right at the bottom. Reload is largely saved by the existence of Fixxxer. St. Anger doesn't have anything even close to as good, so it's easily the worst Metallica album.
 
1. Master of Puppets - 8.8
2. Ride the Lightning - 8.7
3. …And Justice For All - 8.5
4. The Black Album - 8.4
5. Hardwired…To Self-Destruct - 8.0
6. Death Magnetic - 7.6
7. Load - 7.1
8. ReLoad - 6.8
9. Kill ‘Em All - 6.4
10. St. Anger - 2.9
 
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