Rant Thread
- Thread starter Ariana
- Start date
CriedWhenBrucieLeft
Meme Only Account
I've honestly never had friends that talked like that.
If I look back at my friends, it was typically those who talked the least about sexual exploits that evidently had the most. Which was obvious, because you saw them mooching off some chick late in the evening, leave the place with a girl or whatever. All others had to stretch the interpretation of their encounters to the max so they would appear on the same level. The saddest case was a friend who would call me every once in a while and tell me of whatever girl he's into at the moment. After a while I noticed that despite the truly exhaustive (and exhausting) details he told me, it always ended up with them having a boyfriend or things not getting ahead for some other reason. For years, the guy would talk about nothing but girls, and I have no evidence that he ever had sex during that period, rather indications to the opposite. The saddest part was that before that time, he had a great girlfriend who was willing to put up with a lot coming from him. But even then, whenever she was out of the room, he would immediately start talking about some other chicks. And I'm not exaggerating. She went to the bathroom, and he would turn to us and start the talk.
Diesel 11
As you scream into the web of silence...
Oh believe me, they’re not my friends.
Onhell
Infinite Dreamer
Ok I don't believe you
Neighbour sounds really ill with a bad cough.
Saapanael
Ancient Mariner
I guess I can sum up why talking about sexual conquests drives me crazy in three points. First of all, most groups of friends I have talk about this A LOT so I can go from group to group and hear the same old shite in each one. Secondly, I can’t help but feel jealous (“why can’t I succeed if they can?”), even though I know that ultimately the amount is not important and it won’t make you a better person whether you’ve had these conquests or not. Thirdly, I don’t understand the need to constantly boast and prove your worth in front of others. This can be applied to many topics - sometimes I just get overwhelmed by the sheer amount of self-admiration that goes on in the world. In the end, all I can do is just ignore this and accept that I can’t change what other people talk about, only my perception towards it.
Onhell
Infinite Dreamer
I can relate to the jealousy part. Two things, 1. Don't feel jealous, it's part of why they tell their tall tales. I can tell you now, no one cares. 2. Most people seek genuine connections to people. Having a high number of partners, casual or otherwise is not a good thing. I've read a couple of articles and heard a few experts say you want to keep your number of partners to 12 and under. If you still don't find someone, something is wrong with YOU, not them and the harder it is to find that special someone, because it's easier to trivialize relationships, seek something "better" constantly and unable to bond emotionally.
You do you, nothing wrong with being single. Enjoy that FREEDOM while you have it. Relationships are full of compromises. My gf, for example, has rearranged the whole house, now she wants to move, talks about getting a new mattress (it's only 2 years old) and constantly asks when am I getting rid of my old video games. The last time I blasted heavy metal was 2 years ago. But guess what? I'm actually very happy. Just saying it's a grass is always greeener situation with a tad of careful what you wish for.
Ariana
Black-and-white leopard
I am not sure how useful it is to tell people who are looking for a partner to appreciate being single. I understand where you are coming from and believe that everyone needs to appreciate their independence, but for people who have never been in a relationship, this could be counterproductive.
As for the sex talk, there is one thing to remember. When a guy tells you how many women he's been with, chances are he is vastly exaggerating. Vastly. There's no reason to feel jealous whatsoever, it's mostly wishful thinking. Also, it's not normal to talk about sex only. You probably need to look for people with more meaningful interests to spend time with.
As for the sex talk, there is one thing to remember. When a guy tells you how many women he's been with, chances are he is vastly exaggerating. Vastly. There's no reason to feel jealous whatsoever, it's mostly wishful thinking. Also, it's not normal to talk about sex only. You probably need to look for people with more meaningful interests to spend time with.
mtmccox
Ancient Mariner
This is an important part, unless you get a miracle and find the princess perfect. It's lots and lots of sacrifice. Sometimes I am thinking if I was my own mate, I would say "Dude what are you doing you better GTF away from her" But things that are worth it don't come easy.
A little bit off topic, just wanted to point it out.
Onhell
Infinite Dreamer
Not really, it's appreciating what you have before you lose it, causing yourself unnecessary stress before actually having stress, especially for people in their 20s. I know most hate hearing it, I did, but... There's time. Better to wait and find someone who is really worth your time than to rush into something toxic or potentially dangerous just because you want to be in a relationship.
I wholeheartedly agree with this.
As for relationship and/or sex talk, I have no problem with that, but it's not a conversation to have with anyone. Like the time I was at a job training in February and a guy I met that sane morning started talking to me and another guy about how he was once bit while getting a BJ. In that situation, TMI.
Also, from my experience, girls brag about it just as much as the guys. Male witch hunt!!!!!!
Ariana
Black-and-white leopard
My experience shows the same. A woman would never brag about numbers, quite the opposite. It has to do a lot with the common perception that a woman with many sexual partners is promiscuous, while a man with many sexual relationships is seen as a player and generally looked up to.
Saapanael
Ancient Mariner
Oh, thankfully there are more meaningful interests involved as well. Like my band members, who are some of the greatest friends I’ve ever had, but quite often won’t shut up about dirty stuff. Still, I highly value the time I spend with them.
And yeah, I’m not really talking about relationships but casual encounters. While I think that a good relationship will be infinitely more fulfilling, I just want to have some fun before committing to somebody special, so that I would feel less need to fool around once I have committed to someone. I’m really not the guy who would sweet talk someone at a party just to have my way with them, though. It’s not in my personality.
Onhell
Infinite Dreamer
You're an old soul, so again, relax, do your thing and casual or not, it will happen more naturally than you think. Might take a while, but you'll see. I remember in my late teens early 20s I didn't know how people did it, by my mid to late 20s to, well, now... it's old hat.
Yes, the teenage girls doing the boasting weren't boasting about numbers, it was more about how they'd 'netted' some sought-after guy and how experienced or knowledgable they were.