❤ Dating Advice For MaidenFans Thread ❤

Saapanael said:
so why do I miss her so much, even after a year?
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Congratulations on completing a rite of passage. In popular culture they call it, "The one that got away." Many people have someone, especially from their late teens early 20s, that has marked them in some way and they never forget. For me, it's Steph. I think about her to this day and still haunts me in the occasional dream. I've written about them in your dream thread. It's ok to feel the way you do about it. The most important thing is to take away the lessons learned and apply them to the next meaningful encounter you have with someone.
 
Onhell said:
Congratulations on completing a rite of passage. In popular culture they call it, "The one that got away." Many people have someone, especially from their late teens early 20s, that has marked them in some way and they never forget. For me, it's Steph. I think about her to this day and still haunts me in the occasional dream. I've written about them in your dream thread. It's ok to feel the way you do about it. The most important thing is to take away the lessons learned and apply them to the next meaningful encounter you have with someone.
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I think you’re right. Today was a pretty good day and I’m feeling better already.
 
What's a cool response to questions like "Are you looking for a girlfriend?" or "Why don't you have a girlfriend?" when asked by potential girlfriends?

I feel like "I'm deathly scared of rejection" isn't a cool answer, so I'm looking for new ideas.
 
Use it as a chance to talk about how you’re working on yourself/your career. It’s attractive when guys are doing stuff and achieving things.

Aka just vibin’ bro.
 
Saapanael said:
It's been almost a year since I last saw her, and even though I remember her sometimes, the memories have not been painful for a while now. I decided to look at pictures that were taken during my exchange studies, hoping to see her on some of them after a long period of keeping her out of my mind. I didn't expect, however, that I would still be missing her. The moment I saw her on an image, her distinct facial features came back to me. Something in her appearance is just striking. She's not a beauty queen, yet her look is unforgettable.
This sounds funny, but what still pisses me off after all this time is being blocked by her on Instagram. I guess she had enough of my attempts to talk to her back in Zlin. Alright, I don't want to be a creep about it. But it made me think about something: perhaps her ignoring me and taking a dump on my ego is what tore me to shreds more than anything else. Perhaps I'm just such an egoist that I can't bear being treated in that way. How someone I knew for such a brief time has had such an impact on my mental state, I cannot grasp. There's a huge amount of people out there, so why do I miss her so much, even after a year? Is it the human need for closure, a definite answer for what went wrong? I feel like one of those crazies who stalk a celebrity for years, dying to be noticed, unable to lead a normal life. But I'm not a freaking lunatic. Yet knowing that I'll probably never talk to her again is so unsettling. I will do my best to accept it and move on.
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Sometimes it's also worth noticing or realizing that some girls are really just the toying types and that sometimes their only talent is making someone crazy about them. I actually fell for a girl whose most discernible talent was a (in hindsight) very noticeable and manipulative way she endeared herself to various guys (and sometimes girls). An absolutely average person, completely inferior to my wife or even some of the other girls I dated, but very irresistible. All the techniques you could employ to completely rock the ground under someone's feet (including making them feel as if they're completely ignored and then turning a complete, adoring attention to them suddenly etc.) And a dangerously good kissser to boot. And she wasn't even that pretty, she was kinda cute, but she was no bombshell. Still made me go crazy, almost.

Onhell said:
Congratulations on completing a rite of passage. In popular culture they call it, "The one that got away." Many people have someone, especially from their late teens early 20s, that has marked them in some way and they never forget. For me, it's Steph. I think about her to this day and still haunts me in the occasional dream. I've written about them in your dream thread. It's ok to feel the way you do about it. The most important thing is to take away the lessons learned and apply them to the next meaningful encounter you have with someone.
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What's funny about "the one that got away" is that even when you meet them years later and you're completely like "gee, I'm glad I dodged that bullet" - and I totally have this with my particular TOTGA, it was a girl I was absolutely obsessed with then, see above and I am totally not now, see below - you still can't quite let go of the idea that you had of them back then. You kinda aren't able to admit to yourself that you might have been blind in certain ways or whatever.

Like I can see that whatever might have been there then, it's gone completely. In pretty much every way. And some of the stuff even never was there at all. I certainly don't and wouldn't want her now. But still the memory ... kinda hurts.

And TOTGA isn't just for the young

1615356970517.png


Night Prowler said:
What's a cool response to questions like "Are you looking for a girlfriend?" or "Why don't you have a girlfriend?" when asked by potential girlfriends?
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"I am, in fact, looking for a relationship, but I want it to be right. A relationship requires me being interested in them, they being interested in me and a mutual desire to create something beautiful, which I think a relationship definitely can and must be."

Probably not really cool, but all the better - I'd recommend not saying "cool" stuff to girls - if you do, you won't discourage those that are not worthy of your time and efforts.
 
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Night Prowler said:
"Are you looking for a girlfriend?”
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  • “No, they tend to look for me.”
  • “I think I might have just found her.”
  • “Do you have any recommendations?”
  • “Why, do you have one?”
  • “What’s your rate?”
  • “Do you know what’s special about the solo section of ‘Prodigal Son’?”
Night Prowler said:
"Why don't you have a girlfriend?"
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  • “Because I’d rather have three.”
  • “Because I’m too busy thinking about you.”
  • “Because I only listen to black metal and melodeath.”
  • “Because I’m too lazy to dig another grave under my porch.”
  • “Because I’d rather play a round of Cheesevivör than watch a rom-com.”
  • “Because my first question is whether they like Anaal Nathrakh, but they run away mid-sentence.”
 
Night Prowler said:
What's a cool response to questions like "Are you looking for a girlfriend?" or "Why don't you have a girlfriend?" when asked by potential girlfriends?

I feel like "I'm deathly scared of rejection" isn't a cool answer, so I'm looking for new ideas.
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"Why aren't you the one?"
"Are you interested?"
 
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Jer said:
  • “No, they tend to look for me.”
  • “I think I might have just found her.”
  • “Do you have any recommendations?”
  • “Why, do you have one?”
  • “What’s your rate?”
  • “Do you know what’s special about the solo section of ‘Prodigal Son’?”

  • “Because I’d rather have three.”
  • “Because I’m too busy thinking about you.”
  • “Because I only listen to black metal and melodeath.”
  • “Because I’m too lazy to dig another grave under my porch.”
  • “Because I’d rather play a round of Cheesevivör than watch a rom-com.”
  • “Because my first question is whether they like Anaal Nathrakh, but they run away mid-sentence.”
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:lol::applause:
 
Did you really get this question Night Prowler, from a potential girlfriend?
Sounds like a dream come true for me, at least in the time when I was single.
 
"Why don't you have a girlfriend?" Um... don't want one. I remember in highschool, the German exchange students were really fed-up and annoyed with the American girls constantly asking them why they didn't have boyfriends. It's not a life requirement.

JudasMyGuide said:
And TOTGA isn't just for the young
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No, just, statistically tends to happen when you're younger as the emotions hit harder. 3 years ago I helped a friend through a break up. All signs pointed to this woman being his TOTGA, as you put it. I confided in one of the psych professors at the university to make sure I was on the right track with my methods and he asked how old my friend was. When I told him, "32," he was surprised he was "that old," since it tends to happen to much younger individuals.
 
Diesel 11 said:
"I'm just vibin', bro."
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Doesn't work in Serbian, though :(

I just realized that if I ever lived in a country where English is the main language... I'd probably only speak in movie/TV show references, like Abed from Community...

Mosh said:
Use it as a chance to talk about how you’re working on yourself/your career.
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Might put her off though.

JudasMyGuide said:
"I am, in fact, looking for a relationship, but I want it to be right. A relationship requires me being interested in them, they being interested in me and a mutual desire to create something beautiful, which I think a relationship definitely can and must be."
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A bit too serious, but I agree with the sentiment. I mean, that's basically the truth. Probably not the cool answer though, but a mature one for sure :P

Jer said:
  • “No, they tend to look for me.”
  • “I think I might have just found her.”
  • “Do you have any recommendations?”
  • “Why, do you have one?”
  • “What’s your rate?”
  • “Do you know what’s special about the solo section of ‘Prodigal Son’?”

  • “Because I’d rather have three.”
  • “Because I’m too busy thinking about you.”
  • “Because I only listen to black metal and melodeath.”
  • “Because I’m too lazy to dig another grave under my porch.”
  • “Because I’d rather play a round of Cheesevivör than watch a rom-com.”
  • “Because my first question is whether they like Anaal Nathrakh, but they run away mid-sentence.”
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Vibe of this:
tenor.gif

(I did chuckle though :P)

Perun said:
How about "why don't you have a boyfriend?"
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Wish I thought of that, dammit.

Forostar said:
"Why aren't you the one?"
"Are you interested?"
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Good ones if I were a direct fearless person, which I'm not :(

Forostar said:
Did you really get this question Night Prowler, from a potential girlfriend?
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Yeah...
 
Forostar said:
Did you really get this question Night Prowler, from a potential girlfriend?
Sounds like a dream come true for me, at least in the time when I was single.
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I got that a lot when I was single. Usually it was, "Why don't you have a girlfriend? You're so awesome. I'd totally date you if I was single."
 
Perun said:
I got that a lot when I was single. Usually it was, "Why don't you have a girlfriend? You're so awesome. I'd totally date you if I was single."
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That's a red flag, not a compliment. That usually means, "if you ask me to date you I'll dump my boyfriend for you only to do the same to you down the road."
 
No, it was meant as an expression of sympathy and encouragement. It usually came from women who had made it abundantly clear to me that they would not date me.
 
Perun said:
No, it was meant as an expression of sympathy and encouragement. It usually came from women who had made it abundantly clear to me that they would not date me.
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"I'll pretend that you're dateable to make you feel better until you think about my previous behaviours & comments."

I know that one.
 
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