Let's try and get 1,000,000 replies to this post

He's a big softie.
PR551BI77_566_Aberdeen_Soft_Round_SZ1.jpg
 
Serious post time.

I've been struggling badly with anxiety in the past few weeks. It's been bad for a few weeks, but it's actually been a problem since last year with various other symptoms which I've misdiagnosed. It's been a slow burn which I thought I could handle but I obviously can't without putting serious work into getting better.

I've finally been prescribed antidepressants few days ago which I've started taking, but from all the different medications I've tried in the past few weeks, I've been forgetting things a lot and struggle to sleep. And the antidepressants take time to have effect and honestly I can barely clear my mind to work, let alone argue on the forum :p So if I say random stupid stuff a lot, and repeat myself, that's why :p Also why I'm slow at updating games.

Forum (and chat) does help me get my mind off everything, at least a bit. And posting about it. Hope no one minds. It's shitty but I don't wanna be embarassed about it, at least not here.

From what I've read, most people have anxiety issues with socializing, but I feel much better with other people to get my mind off everything. It's when I'm alone with my thoughts that the paranoia sets in. I remember every possible thing that can go wrong at work, or otherwise and that sets off the panic. Hell, I don't even like reading about anxiety because that alone gives me anxiety. I think the beginning of all this was when I got tinnitus 2 years ago which made me scared every time I didn't feel well. Actually, due to anxiety, I've kinda forgotten about tinnitus. Funny how it works.

I felt great on vacation last month, and during the MaidenFans meetup in Bulgaria, because I had something to look forward to and people to socialize with. And I go to uni to hang out with people even though I can barely remember what the lectures are about.

I can't tell anyone at work 'cause it might endanger my future there and so far I've been doing a good job hiding it. It's been a problem since before I even started working and no one noticed and there's no reason to tell them now. At least as long as I can handle it.

I go to a therapist regularly and she told me it might be because I kept all my frustrations with family and general life to myself for far too long and now it's all coming out at once. Well, either way, I'll try to work on it because I have to.

Might edit this post a few times btw. And I'll probably talk about it again.
A super great big hug to you NP! I'll pray tons for you that the anti-depressants help you and things get better for you.
 
Just got back from the Holt/Bello guitar clinic. Holy sh*t was that good, they were so chill and friendly, they answered my questions so enthusiastically, signed all my stuff and took photos, what a great pair of guys. I even got near the chance to have jammed Metallica with Holt himself, but I got too nervous. Can't wait for the big one tomorrow!
 
If you haven't had the chance, watch Turkish Superman and Star Wars, they're full of wtf's and "special effects". Don't bother with Turkish Star Trek tho because it's just a localization (of TOS) with way higher budget.
 
They really make pumpkin yoghurt? Crazy.

Speaking of which, apologies to my Weeta-brethren, I have granola and yoghurt again this morning.
:nonono:

Two bars of regular Weetabix with oat milk again for me. I've been a bit more conservative with the milk than yesterday though.
 
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