Those things i want to forget aren't brutalities of war. I was lucky to live in a city that wasn't heavily affected. There were some minor clashes and a dozen of shells fired from a retreating naval force. I saw air raid sirens as an opportunity to get out of school and chance to hang with rest of the kids in a big nuclear shelter below the building
But i'd gladly forget the economical and social situation that was caused by that damned war. You see, my late grandfather was a Yugoslav army general of Montenegro origin. Already years in retirement when the war happened, but the nationalistic hatred was off the scale. My late grandmother was also a former army officer. Both of them were in Tito's partisan movement of WW2, which was part of allied force. Croatian '90s nationalism celebrated Ustashe regime, and i'm sure you know what kind of monsters those were.
Hordes of hooligans backed by new regime were harassing people of Serbian or Montenegrin origin. They pulled out grandpa of one of my friends in the middle of the night, took him to nearby park-forest and beat the hell out of him, left him there. He barely survived. He was just an ordinary man. So we thought anything could happen. Luckily, nothing like that happened, 'cause my grandpa had balls to take everything that he took as memorabilia from his army days to local police station. A hunting shotgun, a precision rifle, binoculars...he just opened the door and said, hello, this is a donation for new army. Let's just say that he had to walk about a mile to there. If anyone intercepted him...
However, they wiped both my grandpa and grandma from citizen lists. They didn't exist. They had no money from pension fund any more. The flat where we live was given to him by Yugoslav army in late '70s. Yugoslavia had private ownership, something which other communist countries lacked. For instance, my other grandpa/grandma (of mother) bought themselves a flat in the same period. It was theirs, on that name. The other type of housing was "passed". Meaning : Yugoslav government builds a building. They sell apartments. Some of them are bought by individuals as private property, some of them are bought by enterprises or any other institution. The latter are passed on to employees as seen fit. But there is one catch - you're not the owner, but you own the "housing right" on that particular real estate. It's exactly the same, but you can't sell it.
I'm telling this because new Croatian government just erased that "housing right" model from the book, and rendered all those estates a state property. Then they would sell them, but they weren't obliged by new laws to sell them to "previous inhabitants". So they really came with a nice mechanism of ejecting anyone on the street, by choice.
We had a really tough time to clear that issue out. Pulled a lot of strings, a lot. In the end, a final goal was to get the right to buy a damn place. Imagine that, you're struggling to buy something that already belongs to you.
All the existence questions, two elderly people rendered into second grade citizens, father that was working in a computer enterprise which normally fell to pieces with the new system, mother that worked in the bank, remained there, but had a paycheck cut
10 times as it was right before the war. The household income equaling 100 Deutschmark per month, year before that it was several thousand. A brother that's just been born. A family in Sarajevo where the shit was just about to happen, so we needed to house my two older cousins, too. And then, my father gets drafted.
Excuse me, but i want to forget...