You Really Got Me is probably more important to the formation of early metal, but it annoys me to no end.
Mississippi Queen has those nice overwrought, white guy bluesy 70s vocals I enjoy and should win if for the cowbell alone.
Forever has an iconic melodic hook and Roy Khan at the absolute top his game. It’s a classic, pitch perfect Kamelot song that sets the template for many future Kamelot songs. Khan’s jump from enthralling baritone to controlled tenor in the verses is nothing short of magical, the pre-chorus is catchy as hell, and the chorus (though a little sing-songy) is so fun. That part in the second verse with Khan harmonizing himself (“like the morning star and the rising sun”) is masterful. Thomas Youngblood delivers a tasty power metal solo that builds into the final chorus with Khan providing a bunch of vocals in a very similar style to Blind Guardian, but without sounding utterly cluttered. Khan used to
crush this song live and it’s one of
Tommy’s best Khan covers (despite the fact they’ve bloated this thing out to 14 minutes of crowd participation at gigs now). Oh hey, speaking of Blind Guardian! The minstrels are at it again and it’s definitely a fun tune for elves, trolls, and wizards alike. Still, like much Blind Guardian, it’s a bit of a mess, it’s a bit too heavily layered, it’s a bit all over the place. The brief instrumental bridge is great, as is the ridiculous folk sing-a-long that follows, but the song never hooks me like
Forever.
Who are Ugly Kid Joe? Is this a real band? I always thought they were a joke. I know literally NOTHING about them. Wait, are these the guys that covered “Cat’s In The Cradle?” Kinda sounds like a cross between hair metal and, IDK, Blind Melon? It’s vaguely grungy. Candlebox, maybe? Anyway, I’m so disinterested in the song that I’m just rambling.
Don’t Believe a Word wins immediately by kicking things off with a harmonized typical Thin Lizzy riff. Easy, easy win for Thin Lizzy without a second thought. It’s not even a great song, but it’s better than Milkman’s Son.
The main riff of Wheels of Steel is just a shittier version of Cat Scratch Fever. The rest of the song literally never changes or gets better. As usual from Saxon, it has absolutely no reason being six minutes long.
747 is better simply because it’s a minute shorter. There’s still very little going on to keep me interested, but it’s fine enough, I guess? I don’t know. I’m so tired of Saxon.
Blind's intro is infuriating. For a second I think it’s about to be YYZ, then the screechy crap guitar starts, then some bass noodling, then eventually whatever KoRn calls a “riff”. No, Jonathan Davis, I’m not ready. As with all KoRn, the song jumps between whining and yelling at your parents. It stinks. KoRn stink.
Somewhere I Belong is a typical Linkin Park beep-boop, chord-based plus arpeggios and DJ fx pop song. It’s infinitely better than Blind, but that doesn’t make it good.
Metal Church’s titular track has really cool jackhammer riffing and silly, overtly “METAL” vocals - which I guess makes plenty of sense. I can’t say I love the song, but it’s dark and fun. The singer kinda sounds like Geddy Lee doing a pastiche of the cliche “metal voice”. The first part of the instrumental break is kind of a waste, but the second half with everyone shredding together is pretty awesome. I assume they play this track live with the same showpiece gimmick as Iron Maiden? Snowblind has never really done anything for me. It sounds kinda half-assed, honestly. Even the usually cool Sabbath double-time break sounds off. I know the band was coked out of their mind while recording this album, and sure, that’s the point of the song, but it just feels lesser than their work. Surprisingly, I think Ozzy actually sounds the best of everyone here. The keyboard addition is weird, too. I’m sure Sabbath will win this one, and I don’t really care either way, so I’ll toss a vote to
Metal Church.