Knowing about two coworkers "emotional affair"

N

naranja

Ancient Mariner
It's kind of weighing on me. I believe it's still only emotional at this stage, but my housemate, who is single, and who I also work with takes late night flirty phone calls from another coworker (who has a boyfriend).

I believe it's still in emotional (and not yet physical) affair territory at the moment. It's been going on for months.

I don't judge my housemate or the female coworker, but he tells me all the stuff they've been talking about in a casual gossip kind of way: she's complaining about her sex life with her boyfriend, saying she wants to leave him for my housemate and all kinds of stuff she's filling his head with.

I don't know why I'm writing this really, it's just weighing me down knowing a secret I wish I had never known. He has also sworn me to secrecy (might sound a bit over dramatic) but basically doesn't want me to tell anyone else at work in case it messes up his chances. And I'm not going to, so I'm telling you guys.

Just feel like I'm carrying something I never asked for.
 
I feel you. Just got done talking with a friend of mine about my whirlwind summer. Sometimes you just need to unload. However, if it weighs on you like that, id suggest telling your housemate that he can do whatever he wants, but to keep it to himself. He knows it's wrong to a certain degree and that is why he wants you to keep it a secret and frankly it's not your responsibility.
 
The whole thing about emotional affairs is they are really tricky to parse. At a certain point, you have to wonder why this lady isn't actually leaving her boyfriend to go somewhere that, ostensibly, she'd be happy. Most likely he fills a specific role in her life right now, and she doesn't actually want to leave buddy. It sucks to get strung along but the only thing I'd say to your roommate is that if she really does want to get with him, then they should figure that part out, by having her leave her boyfriend.
 
LooseCannon said:
The whole thing about emotional affairs is they are really tricky to parse. At a certain point, you have to wonder why this lady isn't actually leaving her boyfriend to go somewhere that, ostensibly, she'd be happy. Most likely he fills a specific role in her life right now, and she doesn't actually want to leave buddy. It sucks to get strung along but the only thing I'd say to your roommate is that if she really does want to get with him, then they should figure that part out, by having her leave her boyfriend.
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It's not my business really, it's just that I wish I didn't know anything about it whatsoever
 
Romances where you can't avoid the other person if things turn sour are tricky, to say the least. An emotional affair complicates things further and is often a recipe for disaster.

Hormones and feelings make people do crazy things. Just make sure you're not caught in the aftermath or fallout of whatever this situation turns into.
 
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