Politics Role Playing

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I thought up this little game. It is based on the following scenario:

It is 2009. The Democrat President of the USA, Angelo Santo, has achieved what people have been dreaming of for so many years: Chinese democracy. An interim president, Ai Xuwl Rhouz, is currently preparing free, fair and secret elections. A new constitution has been drafted that foresees preservation of human rights, freedom of speech, freedom of press and all that. To thank President Santo for his genuine and important assistance, and to negotiate some details about the future, Rhouz has embarked on a visit to Washington D.C.
After several hours of negotiations behind closed doors, Santo and Rhouz step to the public in a press conference.
What Santo does not know is that last night, photographs showing him and a certain young lady named Desirée Putain kissing in a park were shot and are already circulating in all important newspaper houses.
The inevitable happens. At the press conference, a journalist, Zsolt Far of the New York Times, asks:
"Mr. President, in what way are you engaged with this lady, Ms. Desirée Putain?"
Santo blushes and replies:
"I have never heard of this lady. Next question please."
Another journalist, Takeshi Utagao, of the Tokyo Times, asks:
"What about the photograph showing you and Ms. Putain in an obvious situation last night in a public park in Washington?"
Santo becomes purple in his face and replies:
"I know nothing about any photograph. I must ask you to return to the subject of this conference."

It is now the next morning. Ai Xuwl Rhouz has returned to China, the journalists are typing as wild and it is two hours until the next newspaper issue is being published. The presidents of the US and China need to publish a statement about last night's press conference; they are aware that their respective oppositions have been watching everything closely.
You can take the role of any of the following personalities:

-Angelo Santo (President of the USA)
-Ai Xuwl Rhouz (President of China)
-Zsolt Far, New York Times (Serious American newspaper)
-Takeshi Ugatao, Tokyo Times (Serious foreign newspaper)
-Igor Vlagalishe, National Enquirer (American tabloid)
-Fabian Schleim, BILD (Foreign tabloid)
-Desirée Putain (a certain young lady)
-Inocencia Santo (First Lady)
-Norman Grunt (Leader of the Republicans)
-Zh Lash (Leader of the Chinese Communists)

The big question is... what do you do?

(The idea is that you post your reaction here; it doesn't matter if a role is take twice, this isn't a real RPG)
 
I, Desirée Putain, am on my way to my Scottish Highlands cottage with 50 thousand dollars on my Swiss account.
 
I, Angelo Santo, am willing to resign from office and let the world manage without me so I can follow my desir(é)e. 
 
Yep. They lived happily everafter and had many children.  :mellow:
 
I, Norman Grunt, have sent a team of investigators at taxpayers expense (as I am now in power after the ousting, not resignation as his spin-doctors would have you believe [Tony Blair the second :rolleyes:], of Santo) to determine the mysterious disappearance of the former president. Rumour has it that he has gone to Europe somewhere - that is all we know.

The purpose is to totally discredit the Santo administration whose policies live on in the current Democrats leader. Family issues are at the forefront here, as Santo was a married man before this Desirée Putain came on the scene.
 
I, Ai Xuwl Rhouz, commit suicide after Santo's ousting/resignation becasuse without him the transition into democracy is impossible and I come to realize in fact that Chinese Democracy is not only a rediculous title for Axl Rose' "new" album, but farce and the only way for China to exist is under Communism which our wise father Mao Tze Tong helped shaped.
 
I, Zh Lash, know absolutely nothing at all about Ai Xuwl Rhouz apparent suicide. :innocent:
I, Fabian Schleim, have just had a tip-off as to the where abouts of former President Santo. I am determined to get there before the American investigators (another tip-off, they just can't keep things under wraps, President Grunt stated he wanted a more open and accountable government and it has led to more leaks than a colander). Armed with my trusty photographer and our sleazy traits, we touch down in Glasgow International. ;)
 
Albie said:
I, Fabian Schleim, have just had a tip-off as to the where abouts of former President Santo. I am determined to get there before the American investigators (another tip-off, they just can't keep things under wraps, President Grunt stated he wanted a more open and accountable government and it has led to more leaks than a colander). Armed with my trusty photographer and our sleazy traits, we touch down in Glasgow International. ;)
Click to expand...

You nosey bastard!  :D
 
Maverick said:
You nosey bastard!  :D
Click to expand...
*As Schleim* it's my job. ;)

I, President Grunt, receive positive reports from my investigative team that Desirée Putain had been spotted in the South of France and are following it up. Meanwhile I prepare for my one to one interview with Zsolt Far from the New York Times who wishes to discuss the short-lived democracy that China "enjoyed" and how, if possible, my administration could work with the current Chinese government to restore some faith the Chinese people have lost with freedom of speech. After all, the current mess was created by, shall we say, liberal reporting.
 
I, Zh Lash seize the opportunity and declare the democratic world hypocrisy, name China as the only true democracy and myself as the world-champion of democracy (recognize that, anyone?), murder Ai Xuwl Rhouzand and blame the i-countries for the murder because they were trying to prevent China from getting too politically strong. Therefore I quit all unnecessary collaboration with the rest of the world, removes any possible internal threat from office and rule the country as a self-proclaimed Emperor with an Iron hand.  

Alright Onhell, here comes the edit: Later, I get a visit from God, who orders me to listen to Iron Maiden. Of course, I do and loves the music and name the Capitol after Maiden. When my wife give birth to my daughter, I get thrilled and announces her as the coming Emperess. After my death, when she claims the throne she'll get the nickname "The Iron Maiden" because of her way of ruling. Then, because of her love of Maiden she change the leadertitle from Emperor/Emperess to Iron Man/Iron Maiden.
 
Yax said:
rule the country as a self-proclaimed Emperor with an Iron hand.  
Click to expand...

Only if he listens to Iron Maiden can ye rule with an Iron hand... Chinese don't listen to metal... Japanese do.
 
Onhell said:
Only if he listens to Iron Maiden can ye rule with an Iron hand... Chinese don't listen to metal... Japanese do.
Click to expand...

This Chinese does. Read my edit :p.
 
I, Zsolt Far, prepare to grill the President on three points of interest:

1. A fact has arisen as to where the payment of $50,000 went. This came about due to the Republicans' accounts been made public but the payee was not shown.
2. Little or nothing was done by the American Government during the crisis in China as it woefully took a back-step and became a dictatorial state.
3. Why he had become hell bent on trying to sabotage the work that the now late Ai Xuwl Rhouz and Antos Santo did in creating the Chinese democracy.
 
(I am assuming "Leader of the Republicans" indicates the Speaker of the Houser of Representatives, and that at the GOP has a majority said House)

I, Norman Grunt, arrange a meeting with President Santo that morning. I tell him that the GOP will hold off the media from revealing the scandal until after the Chinese are well on the way to holding a free election. These things are only issues if somebody wants to make a big deal out of them, after all.
This will almost hand the 2012 election to Santo, because he'd be an incumbent president with the diplomatic victory of the century under his belt. In exchange for making this a non-story, however, I make the following demands of the president:
1. Move toward a constitutional amendment defining marriage as "the union of one man and one woman."
2. Cut social security spending
3. Agree not to veto a law limiting abortion to only certain circumstances.

Should those be done, the GOP would agree not to hold up any of President Santo's significant pieces of legislation.
 
I, President Santo, do not yield to blackmail. Maybe my honesty will cost me my career, but I'll have a clear conscience.
 
I, Fabian Schleim, have been completely confused by this latest development as I traipse around the Scottish Highlands trying to get a better signal on my mobile 'coz a furious editor is on the other end. :huh:
 
I, Igor Vladalishe, am having a field day writing amusing fiction... I mean "truth" about Disree and president Santo and their rompy sexcapades, while making astonishing discoveries that Ai Xuwl Rhouz was murdered by Aliens sent by the Russians to stage a "suicide"!
 
Onhell said:
I, Igor Vladalishe, am having a field day writing amusing fiction... I mean "truth" about Disree and president Santo and their rompy sexcapades, while making astonishing discoveries that Ai Xuwl Rhouz was murdered by Aliens sent by the Russians to stage a "suicide"!
Click to expand...
I, Fabian Schleim, begin to wonder if my source of the tip-offs was really genuine. :(
 
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