A Confession and a Plea (an IronDuke poem)

IronDuke

Ancient Mariner
I am IronDuke, and I have a confession to make.
I haven't purchased the new album, A Matter of Life and Death.
I haven't even heard a single song from it.
Why is this?
I don't care.
I really don't car enough to go buy it, or even download 'samples' to hear.
I have heard poor reviews from very smart people.
Why, if I don't care, am I taking the time to even post this?
Well, first of all, I want to increase my post count.
Second, more importantly, I want to be convinced otherwise.
Finally, I like the look of my own sentences.
They're beautifully symetrical and written in blank verse, not unlike James Joyce's Ulysses.
I could use iambic pentameter, or even trochaic tertramater, but I don't.
These sentences remind me of an Edinburgh summer's day with a lovely row boat.
I digress.
I'm not going to listen to it for myself.
Convince me, friends; convince me with your words!
Convince me to buy the album!
Or not.
I don't really care, after all.
 
Duke, if you wait one more year, this album will be available at "low price". Cool he? ;)
 
This is pathetic. I have been thinking about this for a while but now you've convinced me:

*Plunk! -  added to ignore-list*
 
Duke, there is only one person that can convince you to buy the album that is yourself.
Forget what smart people have told you, that is their opinion, not yours. Go download it, borrow it from a friend. And if you like it then buy it. If you don't, you've not lost anything but some of your time.
I did try to make this into to some poetic prose, but failed miserably, so I'm afraid the response will have to be written in such manner. :D
 
IronDuke - you are one pretentious tw4t.

So you don't care? That's cool 'cos maiden probably don't give a shite about you as well.
 
First Son Of A First Son said:
IronDuke - you are one pretentious tw4t.

So you don't care? That's cool 'cos maiden probably don't give a shite about you as well.

I salute you, sir. You're bright enough to manage to spell "pretentious" properly, yet you feel the need to replace letter with numbers in the very next word. You might want to see a psychologist; I hear they've made great strides in treating bipolar adolescents.

As for Iron Maiden not caring about me, I have to agree to a certain extent. Iron Maiden is a non-corporal entity consisting of corporal musicians. Unless you watch a lot of Star Trek, you'll know that a collective unit cannot care, cannot hate, cannot feel pain, etc. Iron Maiden has no feelings about anything. At all. The individual members of the Iron Maiden band, however, probably don’t care much for either one of us (me because I don’t buy their albums, and you because you're an idiot.)
 
I think you should buy the album to save Ol' Benny's soul.  The more people that hear his plight, the more chance he'll have at salvation.  :yes:
 
I suppose you don't consider the posters on this board to be smart people? Since many of us are very impressed with this album and consider it one of their best...If that's the case, how can we convince you to buy an album most of us have already said is brilliant? After all, you've heard "poor reviews from very smart people..."
Here's a piece of advise: listen to it, then decide for yourself.
Only stupid people take over the opinions formed by others without thinking themselves :smartarse:
 
You would be correct, Anomica, if the premises on which your conclusions are based were not incorrect. The people I have consulted are, in fact, people who frequently post on these forums. (I suffer from an acute lack of fellow Maiden fans in my area of the world...these forums are my only source of discussion of the band)
I won't mention names, because those people might be roasted alive or something :innocent:

COUGHONHELLCOUGH
 
The album is good, at least there are 4 or 5 great tracks. In my opinion this justifies someone buys it. However, I like this topic because it illustrates to which extent "fans" could be limited when some posters do not accept the fact that someone did not buy the last album of their favorite band...Hilarious!  :lol:
 
JackKnife said:
some posters do not accept the fact that someone did not buy the last album of their favorite band...
It's even worse than that. Some posters pretend to joke about it, whereas in reality they are shaking with rage. :innocent:
 
I suggest we organise an expedition to Newfoundland and sort out this Duke geezer. Anyone with me?  :bigsmile:
 
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