Adrian Smith Statements

SinisterMinisterX

SinisterMinisterX

Illuminatus
Staff member
Adrian Smith told me to start this thread, since the old one got deleted.
Adrian Smith makes a great BLT sandwich, but his BLT items are bricks, lava and tarantulas.
Adrian Smith can move so fast that he reaches his destination before he leaves his current location.
Adrian Smith's Holy Mullet currently resides in a secret sanctuary, waiting for the day when the Not-As-Holy Goatee gets shaved off, at which time the Holy Mullet shall return to Adrian Smith's head and all the nations of the world shall prostate themselves in the direction of Adrian Smith five times per day.
Adrian Smith can change the oil in his car by merely snapping his fingers, but he doesn't: he makes Dennis Stratton change his oil.
Adrian Smith can beat over fifty thousand 5-year-olds in a fight.
Adrian Smith is El Chupacabra.
Adrian Smith can take out the garbage by merely snapping his fingers, but he doesn't: he makes Dennis Stratton take it out.
Adrian Smith loves cats, or as he calls them: the breakfast of champions.
Adrian Smith played drums on Virtual XI, then started the rumor that Steve Harris did it.
Adrian Smith once wrote a song so powerful that upon hearing it, the people of the world wept for it had been revealed to them what a silly waste of time their life was in comparison to the majesty of this song. Sayitwithmebrother: PASCHENFUCKINGDALE!
Adrian Smith can wash the dishes by merely snapping his fingers, but he doesn't: he makes Dennis Stratton wash them.
Adrian Smith can write computer programs in 37 different programming languages, including 4 that nobody else knows.
Gutzon Borglum attempted four times to carve the face of Adrian Smith into Mount Rushmore, but failed each time as the stone itself refused to hold such a graven image.
Adrian Smith is larger than himself.
Adrian Smith can vacuum his carpets by merely snapping his fingers. This he does, because he's making Dennis Stratton mow the lawn at the same time.
Adrian Smith would like to remind all persons that the Adrian Smith Statements thread is for Adrian Smith Statements only, and anything else will be DELETED.
 
There is no theory of evolution. Just a list of animals Adrian Smith allows to live.

Some kids piss their name in the snow, Adrian Smith can piss his name into concrete.

Jesus can walk on water, but Adrian Smith can swim through dry land.

When Adrian Smith crosses the street, the cars have to look both ways.

Adrian Smith has already been to Mars; that's why there are no signs of life there.

If Adrian Smith is late, time better slow the fuck down

Adrian Smith can touch MC Hammer.

Adrian Smith counted to infinity. Twice.

Apple pays Adrian Smith 99 cents every time he listens to a song.

Adrian Smith doesn't actually write books, the words assemble themselves out of fear.

God wanted to create the world in 10 days. Adrian Smith gave him 6.

God said "Let there be light", Adrian Smith said "Say please".

Adrian Smith can unscramble an egg.

Adrian Smith lost his virginity before his dad did.

Adrian Smith knows the last two digits of Pi

Adrian Smith can slam a revolving door.

Adrian Smith is the man from Nantuckett.
 
wasted155 said:
There is no theory of evolution. Just a list of animals Adrian Smith allows to live.
Adrian Smith counted to infinity. Twice.
Apple pays Adrian Smith 99 cents every time he listens to a song.
Click to expand...

Adrian Smith hates it when people rewrite Chuck Norris "Facts" as Adrian Smith Statements.
Adrian Smith suspects that if he really searched the entire site linked just above, he'd find the rest of wasted155's post there too.
Adrian Smith points to wasted155 and proclaims: "Pwned."
Adrian Smith insists that all Adrian Smith Statements be original creations, lest he unleash his mighty guitar and play a solo so amazing that your brain fries.
 
OK, wasted bows to Adrian Smith:

Adrian Smith came before both the chicken and the egg.

The sun never sets on Adrian Smith.

One time, at band camp, Adrian Smith was a flute.

When Jesus told the fishermen to throw the net on the other side of the boat, Adrian Smith filled it with fish.

Adrian Smith is the answer to the Ultimate question of life, the universe, and everything.

Adrian Smith doesn't wait on hold for the phone company, they wait on hold for him.

Adrian Smith took the road less traveled, and every one else took X Factor.

Adrian Smith knows the identity of the final five.

Adrian Smith audits the IRS.

If you cross the beams of positron colllider, only Adrian Smith can save you.

If you have to ask, only Adrian Smith knows.
 
What? The old one got deleted? Well, 'ere we go.

Adrian Smith has the power to heal.
Adrian Smith has the gift of the second sight.
Adrian Smith is the chosen one.

So it has been written.
 
Adrian Smith can right-click on a Mac.
Adrian Smith can transform into an 18 wheeler at will.
Adrian Smith invented rippled chips.
Adrian Smith is your mother's secret cooking ingredient.
Adrian Smith can accelerate to super-sonic speed with sub-sonic effort.
Adrian Smith ignores Max-Q.
Adrian Smith does not drive a car.  The car takes him where he wants to be out of awe.
Adrian Smith's aura sometimes manifests as the Northern Lights.
Adrian Smith occasionally designs interplanetary probes.  These probes are statistically the most efficient in NASA history.
If Adrian Smith played professional sports, his name would be on every single trophy.  Every time.
Similarly, Adrian Smith would win gold, silver and bronze in every Olympic sport if he could participate.
The Olympic medals podium strong enough to support Adrian Smith has never been built.
 
Adrian Smith told me to read the first post in this thread, in which it is clearly stated:

Adrian Smith would like to remind all persons that the Adrian Smith Statements thread is for Adrian Smith Statements only, and anything else will be DELETED.
 
In reference to the deleting posts thread...
If Adrian Smith says it's a blackboard, it damn well is one even if it's white.
 
Adrian Smith's guitar was not stolen.  He let the criminals 'acquire' it, so he could locate and terminate them.  It's sort of like using marked notes in a bank sting.
 
Adrian Smith let his guitar be stolen because he does not need the guitar to be physically present to play it.
 
Adrian Smith is the heart of everything.
Adrian Smith will send you deep into oblivion if he wants too.
Adrian Smith is the ONE and ONLY.
Adrian Smith's secret identity is Benajamin Breeg.
Adrian Smith is the difference between Coca Cola and Pepsi.
Adrian Smith is the "bornless one".
 
Adrian Smith has absolutely EVERYTHING to do with the price of tea in China.

Adrian Smith left your toilet seat up; you are utterly powerless to do a damned thing about it.
 
Adrian Smith invented metal bands, because he was tired of playing all instruments.
Adrian Smith invented these instruments because he needed some background for his amazing solos.
Adrian Smith invented solos to amaze people.
Adrian Smith invented humans so he had somebody in his metal bands.

Adrian Smith invented music as the only way to write down the secret of the life.
Adrian Smith invented sound because he was bored of people just opening their mouths, without saying anything.
 
Adrian Smith created the guitar, because playing air guitar sometimes looks just stupid.
Adrian Smith created drums, because playing air drums looks even more stupid.
Adrian Smith created bass so 'Arry would also have an instrument to play.

Real World said:
Adrian Smith is my boss.


Incidentally, while isn't the most amusing comment it is 100% true.
Click to expand...

How so, RW? :)
 
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